24 Hours looks at the Celebration of Light which faces a $500,000 shortfall, and has until the end of February to find that cash or the yearly fireworks display is over. Meanwhile the front cover sports David Suzuki who is off on a cross country tour for the environment - his campaign hits Vancouver February 27th.
The Province also goes with the potential end of the fireworks show. Of course, "HSBC Bank Canada, the title sponsor, is lined up again this year. However, you just knew something like this was behind it: Telus will not renew its three-year, $300,000 sponsorship."
Nice to see the Vancouver Sun rip themselves off the Pickton trial for a few minutes to give us this headline this morning: "B.C. faces future flood of 'climate refugees': RCMP". Of course if the environmentalists at the RCMP are predicting future climate disasters, thats front page news.
One month in, and our fourth installment of The Vancouverite Sixpack. This week we have a great old/new song from the upcoming Arcade Fire album, as well as some new stuff from Andrew Bird and The Klaxons.
Smokin' Aces. The buzz on this was kind of "Tarantino knockoff". But the dialogue isn’t always there and the violence is, well, beyond senseless. Girls with 50 caliber guns? In Vegas? Come on. Whatever, Alicia Keyes is total hotness. Ben Affleck has a handlebar mustache (in fact there were plenty of cool mustaches in this. Well-played Mathew Fox.) Jason Bateman is worth the price of admission alone, while no one could possibly believe for a second that smarmy Ryan Reynolds could be in the FBI, ever. Bonus points for a taste of Ennio Morricone’s “The Story Of A Soldier” from The Good, The Bad & The Ugly and the end titles, which were cool. I had high hopes for this, after reading the director's blog. But, no. C.
Letters from Iwo Jima. All you need to know is that this is a far superior film to Flags of our Fathers. The colors – muted earth tones – turn alive during the battle scenes, and it looks great. When you walk out of the film and think about the soldiers from Imperial Japan being just like our side, you know Eastwood did his job as a filmmaker. The only slip up would be the introduction of the film with the modern bookends (always a questionable call) and a bit of subtle bending of some details of history. But a stunning meditation on war and those who fight it. And the music is just about perfect. How does Blondie make a foreign film? That rules. A-.
Good lord, I'm so very glad I went to Sip Resto Lounge (1117 Granville) before going to their website (Reservations at Open Table). Otherwise I wouldn't have gone. And believe me if you stay too long the place becomes a dance club by the sounds of it. That said I shared some great starters, wine, and dessert there on the eve before Dine Out Vancouver ruined the restaurant scene for a couple of weeks. Although it seemed like some of the Dine Out population was already out. Do these people ever go out for dinner? Dine Out Vancouver is pure evil hell. That was our first topic of conversation. Next was the Serbian and Croation fans fighting at the tennis match in Australia. But that is another story, what about the damned food already:
I'm not sure if they do in fact have "The Best Crab Cakes Ever" (bold statement) like they claim to on the menu, but they were tasty - and best of all kind of as good as one of those one-bite brownie deals. Pop 'em in your mouth, yum. Then again when you have Belgium Beer Battered fries served with a bunch of shooters full of sauce you're pretty well setup. Fries and sauces are good - and it was refreshing they they weren't yam fries for a change. Not that I have anything against yam fries. But enough is enough. The 7 Cheesy Dip (how do you go, no it needs more cheese when you have say 5 or 6 cheeses in a dip?) was great and put some of that with the fries. Just do it. It says there is 18-year old Glenfiddich in there somewhere. Sure. The calamari wasn't anything special, but maybe it was because the cheese perogies had lots of chorizo bits with it. Hard to compete. Bonus meats, always a good call.
Oh ya, and the Mocha Bailey's Creme Brulee was completely ridiculous. As is my nature I am writing them a letter to see if they would come make over to my place and turn my bathtub into the biggest creme brulee ever. Yes, it was that delightful. And don't forget, it is open until 2am, which is nice if you want a late night crab cake.
In the endless list of new condo living developments in Vancouver there is finally Smart: Gastown Living. The ads ask "what makes smart so smart?" Well, that a stupid question! The reality is, you get: "sustainable, efficient, forward-thinking design" and "european-style linear kitchens." Only on the website do you get this bit of affirmation: "Smart is a smart place to call home AND a smart investment." That is smart!
This dwelling is so ridiculously smart, that in one of the interior shots there is a Yellow Tail bottle of wine, 'cause nothing screams smart like Yellow Tail...and seriously, if this video doesn't cue you to smarten up and buy, you're completely dumb, this is an area "in transition" people! Another smart feature.
I think it's pretty apparent that there are some big fans of Heroes and 24 over here at The Vancouverite. It's probably because these are two of the best shows currently on television, which makes it no suprise that Monday has now surpassed Thursday at the greatest night of TV during the week. Remember when Survivor was fresh and new? Or Must-See-TV? I thought not - those days are so far behind us that we should all bow down to the gods Bauer and Hiro. They're my two picks for the icons of the new Monday regime. And if you're techno-deficient like me and don't even own a VCR, Global is being a good friend and staggering the two shows so that even us 1960s throwbacks can experience all the love.
I would like to thank Fox, NBC and the Asper family for making this all possible.
So here we are, still going strong into week three, and I've got six more tracks coming at you, including the infectious "I Am John" by Loney, Dear, and the epic "The Birth And Death Of The Day" from the upcoming Explosions In The Sky album.
*Finally the time has come for a new episode of Heroes. The PVR will now be doing even more good things for me as I can manage the Heroes/24 'Monday of Awesome' that starts today. I'd put Studio 60 in there, but I watched last night and seems to have become a romantic comedy now. Not only is there a great promo for tonight's Heroes, but you can also catch Ali Larter in the trailer for Homo Erectus.
*Trailer Park:Sunshine looks pretty rock n' roll. And Blades of Glory with Will Ferrell might be worth seeing.
*And since I watched it this weekend, a song from the Buffy Musical episode, "I'll Never Tell". And musical episodes are quite amazing. I'd pay to see a 30 Rock or Office one.
*I'm sure you've seen this, but if not, you must. No More Kings "Sweep the Leg". Best Week Ever writes, "this is nothing less than the Citizen Kane of online comedy videos. It has everything you could ever want from a few minutes of semi-ironic pop culture nostalgia - aging Cobra Kai hooligans, Ralph Macchio, a post-apocalyptic John Creese, and Mr. Belding."
*Saturday Night Live had a pretty amazing spoof of MacGyver this weekend - you can see all three bits of "MacGruber" on NBC's site. So amazing: "Jo Jo, That Dog Turd!" "Pubes. I need a lot of them and I need them now." And for good measure, MacGyver on Family Guy.
Babel. I'm not sure this movie ever really lives up the hype of its Golden Globe, but it is watchable, at some points engrossingly so, even at 142 minutes, you'd never know it. But, at some points you do wonder "why are these characters doing such really stupid things?" So inspite of itself, it succeeds in making you want to watch. Well, as much as you could bare watching last year's version, Crash. B-
The Good German. You'd think Clooney + Soderberg + black and white loveliness would equal an instant classic. If you sat through this movie you would know why that isn't so. It is sad that the poster was better than the movie, even though it was full of spectacular black and white beauty shots. C-
Idiocracy. Any movie that promises so many groin kicks, truck and tractor pulls and a language that has devolved into an odd mix of, "hillbilly, Valley Girl, inner-city slang, and various grunts," directed by Mike Judge (Office Space) and featuring Maya Rudolf as a prostitute just has to be enjoyed. You can now officially thank Fox for both cancelling Arrested Development and keeping this cult classic from us. Bastards. B
An Inconvenient Truth. Finally saw this. Will Al Gore's power point presentation get an Oscar nomination this week? I guess the film works if Harper is faking Green, and Bush is set to admit that global warming exists Tuesday. But seriously, kudos for the marketing brains who are rebranding global warming into the more impressive but nebulous climate change. Nevermind that, Gore in '08? Bwhahahaha. Bonus: Sarah Silverman one ups this on Kimmel with "Global comforatabling" You can watch the other side of the story from the CEI.C+
I recently finished watching Magnum P.I. Season 1. The original opening and theme song (it changes after some episodes) was killer. Almost as killer as Magnum on The Family Guy. And almost as sweet as hearing the buzz that Mathew McConaughey might be throwing down with the 'stache' in the movie version. And almost as awesome as further news that Steve Zahn and William H. Macy will be playing Rick and Higgins. Makes you want to rush out and order a T-shirt like this, don't it? This would be so much better than the previous rumors which pegged Ben Affleck as Magnum, which would be totally insane. "All right, all right, all right."
First, was hitching a ride with Jesse in his fairly smug Rover of somesort. I don't say that to mock him, or to sound particularly smug either, but he found a parking spot on Granville in like 5 seconds and so what if he drove that thing all up and over the curb. The homeless kids on the street begged for money in the following way, "You have to give us something for having to watch that." And we did.
That was only the start. We had a fairly strict "two Canuck jersey" rule going into Doolins Irish Pub. There were at least three within the first 5 seconds. Ouch. And when Jesse kept asking our waitress Stephanie for both a Pimms and a cheese plate (it's Doolins) every time she came by, you can imagine, hilarity ensued. Doolins makes you question the whole concept of the Irish Pub and, well, Irishness in general. Thank goodness there is yet another one coming to Vancouver one block over at Smithe and Granville in the old Skybar location called Ceilis. It's not open yet and it looks awful. I no longer question the assertion that there is such a things as "Irish Pub in a Box."
So over to the Granville Room (seriously, did they just play Pixies music when I went to the website? That's just awesome) we went. A cheese plate was had and Jesse introduced us to the infamous Pimms Cup. Or a version of it anyway - served with Ginger Ale, a cucumber slice and an apple slice. Wierd. Smug. Wackily Delicious. (Anyone for a Pimms?) I just can't believe I used to mock the bottle of Pimms behind the bar. The lesson: cheese plate + Pimms = instant awesomeness.
Saw a fairly craptacular Starbucks print ad in the Globe and Mail. It's probably not new, but it certainly is Vancouver. Gastown actually, which is fine but did they really write this copy:
8:45 a.m. Mark and Scooter.
Searching out the fifth (and best) tree for Scooter to pass his hellow to the next pooch to come along. Mark's reward for this little adventure? A double Americano with room. And serious bonus-points for walking his girlfriend's dog.
Life happens over coffee.
Jesus. I don't even know where to start. But who exactly are they trying to get pumped for Starbucks with this ad? He's walking a ratty little dog with a jacket on while Mark's girlfriend is probably sleeping in. Or is that just his cover story? Double Venti Lameness. Okay, that was bad. I regret writing it. So The way I see it #322: Be a man Mark, you pussy.
The Vancouver Sun starts off the first day of the Robert Pickton murder trial with tales of polls (52 percent of people are interested in media coverage of this) as we embark on a year of trial action. It's those stories, an editorial, a column, a photo gallery (online), timeline, and probably 6 or more stories. In case you couldn't figure out that this is a big news story, the Sun has you covered. Meanwhile Vancouver is 13th least affordable city in world and now we are getting the '08 Canadian Figure Skating championships.
Not surprisingly, The Province also starts the week off with wall to wall Pickton coverage. 24 Hours follows suit with a short cast of characters piece.
You know when it is 9:01, and you were planning on not posting today, again. I know I'm a deadbeat, but somehow you get to watching a Mitsou "Bye Bye Mon Cowboy" video already. Kind of total amazingness. That is all.
* Best Week Ever calls it: "It’s Little Superstar meets Tom Cruise… and it’s awesome." This one has to be dedicated to Marslees and Anthony. Many of you will enjoy. Strange?
*Nice for us that CBS turning to the power of You Tube to encourage the full power of sock puppets and peace for the new 15 seconds of fame. Thanks You Tube!
*Favorite Golden Globe hook up: Piven and America's Next Top Model Melrose. "Piven’s a tiny little guy and the captain of the his own smarmy."Gawker says, "Caridee may have won the competition, but Melrose won the real prize. If that's a prize. Who wants to be the one to tell her that he's not really an agent?"
Last night’s Golden Globes had a few shockers (Ugly Betty’s two big wins) but most of the night’s winners and losers were fairly predictable . This should have been posted this morning, but our fearless editor was, er, probably out to lunch or something like that. Gawd.
There were a few fun surprises (Tom Hanks and Sacha Baron Cohen mentioning balls and testicles in their respective speeches), too many boring speeches (Meryll, it’s your sixth Golden Globe, there is no one left to thank) and the always entertaining fashion disasters. Here’s my vote for the top 5 best and worst moments/outfits of the night:
Worst
Worst impersonation of a Golden Globe:Beyonce. Her last desperate attempt to upstage Jennifer Hudson was just sad. Very very sad.
Worst homage to her homeland:Penelope Cruz. You’re Spanish, not a Flamenco Dancer. I’m pretty sure they’re not the same thing.
Worst ‘please look at me, my career is in the crapper’ dress:Jennifer Love Hewitt. When you’re at an awards show with Beyonce and you are the tackiest thing there, it’s time to fire your stylist. Or in this case, consider one.
Me thinks the ability to comment on our posts is defunct. Well actually you can comment, but it isn't coming through. So until it's fixed you can send tips, news, ideas, smut & nudie pics to the following address: vancouverite@thevancouverite.com
Well, I have to say I'm pretty proud of myself, and have actaully made two consecutive weekly posts. (Even Jackson didn't think it would happen). But true to my word I'm bringing you another six pack with more music for you to jam to this week. And, although I know that absolutely no one posts any comments, We'd love your input and suggestions for new music we might not know of yet.
Set your PVRs people! Jack's back, and all signs point to amazing for the sixth day of 24. I've heard rumours that the first four hours are incredible, but I guess we'll all know for sure in a little more than 48 hours... Seriously, do not miss this show; the four hour, two night premiere begins Sunday at 8 pm on Fox.
*OMG. Did you see 30 Rock tonight? Not only was there the above, meat is the new bread insanity, but Jack Donaghy (Alec Baldwin) on the question, Do you lik Phil Collins? "I've got two ears and a heart don't I?"
"I'm sure there's a perfectly reasonable explanation as to why Lindsay Lohan was running down a Miami street in her bikini last week, but I've given up trying to understand why she does the things she does. In her mind there was probably a shark chasing her down in a go-kart." [The Superficial]
*I'll admit it. If Scarlett Johansson was working for me as a nanny I might rethink my no baby policy. PS: If it is true about her shacking up with JT, it begs one question - well one right after the initial, "What a jerk" question - is Justin Timberlake the luckiest bastard ever?
*Marketing campaigns for cities are so adorable. Paris launches: C'est so Paris.
*"Aah, hahahahahahahaha! OH MY GOD! (snicker. spittle.) Darfur? BWHAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh god, my sides. 50 dead in Baghdad car bombing....Haaaaahahahahahhaha!!! Honey, check out this funny corpse!" [Copyranter]
Cereal is not a laughing matter. It is serious business. So for those that don't get much variation, or are stuck eating stillborn chickens for breakfast, here is a handy countdown of the top cereals on the market last year.
Using the following scoring system:
10/10 Taste
5/5 Toys and included goodness/contests
5/5 Complete Lack of Nutritional Value
5/5 Ability to eat without Milk
5/5 Bowls per box
1/1 Price
10. Kellogg's Special K Red Berries Total Score 13/31
Highlights - Dehydrated fruit just like the astronauts eat
Downside - Box is too small, maybe 3 bowls full. Too much nutritional value here. It even smells healthy.
9. Cocoa Krispies Total Score 17/31
Highlights - Chocolate. Super Toys. 7 bowls per box. Fuckin super rice krispies squares.
Downside - Not hardcore enough, too childish.
8. Kellogg's Special K Vanilla Almond Total Score 18/31
Highlights - Nuts Almonds, stays super crispy. Makes great squares. Bigger box than it's fairy Red Berries partner.
Downside - Too much nutritional value. Kind of a girly cereal and box.
7. Honey Bunches of Oats with Almonds Total Score 19/31
Highlights - The sheer awesomeness of the taste destroys the healthiness of it.
Downside - Oatmeal is cold cereal's bitter rival. So you are a fence sitter by eating this.
6. Frosted Flakes Total Score 22/31
Highlights - Got on this list because of sweet toys and even sweeter loads of sugar.
Downside - My teeth hurt after a couple bowls.
(note* - a low sugar version was produced but it tastes like plastic)
5. Golden Grahams Total Score 23/31
Highlights - So sweet. Like candy for breakfast wasn't the greatest thing ever.
Downside - You have to eat it in approx 63 seconds after coming into contact with milk or it goes soggy.
4. Post Oreo O's ( found stateside only unfortunately ) Total Score 25/31
Highlights - The creator of this cereal had some serious balls.
Downside - Can't find it in Canada. But you could just crush Oreo cookies and put in milk.
3. Kellogg's Smorz Total Score 27/31
Highlights - Makes good milkshakes - can be eaten anytime, anywhere.
Downside - Gets soggy way to fast - also hard to find in most stores.
2. Nesquik Total Score 30/31
Highlights - Cereal in chocolate milk seriously pwnscereal in regular milk
Downside - Eating without milk is totally pointless
1. Reese's Puffs Total Score 1,000,000/31 ( ridiculous yes, but then you have never tried them )
Highlights - This is what awesomeness tastes like as solid matter sprinkled with sheer delight. A viable cure for cancer and depression.
Downside - You won't find a bowl big enough
Seriously, I’ve just started to recover some Canucks pride. If Fitzpatrick had hit the ice on the 24th, well that really would have just shit all over this miracle on ice last 7 games.
For all you non-hockey fans out there, Rory Fitzpatrick is your basic 2nd rate Canucks defenseman. Great guy by all accounts, but the man has 1 point to his name this season. A total unknown until some Rochester, N.Y. douche bag started a Vote for Rory‚ campaign to send Fitzpatrick to the All Star game (exposing flaws in the new voting system).
Just Jared calls this one. On Gwen Stefani's “Sweet Escape” video: "The hair? Ridiculous. The excessive amount of Gwen’s “G” emblems everywhere? Ridiculous. The black and white skintight prison jumpsuits? Ridiculous. The “Rapunzel, Rapunzel, Let Down Your Hair” storyline? RIDICULOUS."
"Good. Bad. I'm the guy with the gun." A marketing dude (notice I didn't say 'marketing dbag' - see I'm not a total jerk...) named Sean sent this Old Spice commercial starring Bruce Campbell in. This one's for you guy. By the way, Sean also informed me of his new years plan of dressing up 2-3 times a day. I'm just saying...This is perfect if only to then reference Army of Darkness quotes. "My name is Ash and I am a slave. As far as I can tell, the year is 1300 A.D and I'm being dragged to my death. It wasn't always like this, I had a normal life, once. "
24 Hours fronts the visit to Stanley Park by new environment minister John Baird. But this was the best part: "A lone protester, 66-year-old Ann Grant, made her way to the conference - park staff blocked the roads leading into Prospect Point so only media could enter - to plead with the government to respect the Kyoto Accord.
'They're not doing enough,' said Grant, sporting a horned Stephen Harper mask and a pitchfork with Planet Earth impaled on its tip. 'More extreme weather is likely to be caused by global warning if we keep ignoring it. It's already happening.'"
The Sun has an interesting story on how the campaighn heads of the three federal parties are from BC. "One theory is that the rise of B.C. talent to the top jobs proves that the province, long considered the scene of the country's wackiest politics, has become one of the most tightly contested political arenas in Canada. That has made it one of the best training grounds in the country for parties to pick up political talent."
And more from Baird, "It's another reason why we have to act on climate change."
I watched the first part of CBC's Dragon Boys last night. Rather than a review you can view some real time thoughts. This would have worked equally well this morning for the great episode of Dawson's Creek I watched. Anyway here you go:
8:00. Opening credits – Chinese characters on red, lame logo, lame typography
Gratuitus slow -os, hooray!
The warning…”Dragon Boys is a disturbing, realistic portrayal of gang activity on Canada’s west coast. It contains scenes with extreme violence, frequent course language and sexual activity, intended for a mature viewing audience…”
Lets go "hand held"…wait, lets go hand held during really lame pseudo fight. "So cool".
27 minutes in, and I’m totally bored.
Flagrant helicopter (or plane) shots of Richmond. Factoid: Is Richmond is the most depressing suburb in the lower mainland, from the air at least?
8:39. Karaoke! Sweet.
8:52. Use of the term ‘egg roll’ followed by a really super Rosie O’Donnell “Ding Dong Chow” moment by one of the films many stupid white hoods (or is it foot soldiers, I can never get that distinction right) yo.
9:08. Screw ball cop comedy now?
9:18. Country music. This is multicultural. Advantage Alberta veiwers.
9:19. Quote: “I guess its just one of those Chinese things. Like eating your cat.” They had me with the cat hating.
9:48. Still watching…sort of. Some sort of samurai warrior wisecrack.
9:59. Wow. Montage.
The hours approaching, just give it your best
You've got to reach your prime.
That’s when you need to put yourself to the test,
And show us a passage of time,
We're gonna need a montage (montage)
Oh it takes a montage (montage)
Cliff hanger. Still no car chase? After 2-hours. Hmmm.
24 Hours is a little bit too excited about the BC Place dome debacle of '07. I always enjoy when news orgs make themselves central to the news story, "24 hours was first to report in a Friday podcast that ice and snow wasn't cleared from the roof before a panel ripped. A source said ice and snow "avalanched" late in the noon hour Friday, causing a tear in the air-supported fabric roof above Level 4's Section 54. The roof was rapidly deflated to minimize damage." If it was all a reason to revisit the really bad ideas for naming the dome, 24 Hours wins: "Cream Puff Stadium, Excitement Dome, Our Father's House, Pac Man Stadium, Pigeon Place, Rain Bowl, Turtle Dome, Unknown Dome, Vanburger, Whoopee Stadium."
The Sun reports on the BC Place roof as well, but at least they give us hope, "Crosley said the roof will be inflated to its regular dome shape when all the tears are repaired." Phew! If it didn't get back to regular dome shape, this would be a scandal. Meahwhile Iain MacIntyre tries to reconcile the Canucks 7-game win streak with future dissapointments, "For their last 191 minutes, the Canucks have looked vulnerable, no longer impervious to bad play as they had seemed when they began this winning streak on Boxing Day. Yet, they found ways the last three games to overcome their mistakes and win in extra time."
The Province bucks the trend giving the big frontpage story to a Beauty queen trying to save a life. This is clearly done to cover up the Ed Willes tongue kiss to Robert Luongo. "After 43 games Roberto Luongo has established himself as the point through which the Vancouver Canucks' fortunes will flow. This season. Next season. For as long as he's wearing the team's colours. He's the reason the Canucks are respectable now and he's the reason there's hope for the future."
Thankfully there are a couple of remainders from the Sunday edition. like news Joy of joys, word on the new Naomi Klein book "Blank is Beautiful: The Rise of Disaster Capitalism", "The author of No Logo is back with another book that looks at the perils of capitalism and globalization. Klein argues the remaking of the world into the global marketplace is built upon violence and "shock therapy" of various sorts: physical, social and economic. Blank promises to be the thing publicists dream of: controversial." There's also a really amazing What's in, what's out for 2007 list. I say this is a bit of a wash to be honest, "In: Cardigans for men. Out: Blazers over a hoodie. Trend-conscious men are abandoning the trusty blazer-over-a-hoodie look in favour of geek-chic cardigans. Today's cardigans are less Mr. Rogers and more an offbeat style statement, showing up in collections from Yves St. Laurent to Paul Smith."
So I am going to try something new for 2007. Instead of a monthly playlist, I'm going to post six tracks to help you get through the week. My hope is that you can all be exposed to more music and also keeps me more in tune with what's out there. Each weeks pack will be accompanied by artwork incase you wish to burn the tracks to a disc or transfer to your MP3 player. And by all means if there is someone you think we should be listening to, leave a comment or send us an email. So without further ado here it goes, the first Vancouverite Sixpack:
I posted first because I am standing outside the total carnage that was BC Place. Around noon today the roof of BC Place imploded sending thousands of seagulls to their deaths, or to another roof in the city. My sources have yet to confirm.
The Lions deserve a better home though so this is good news so long as no one got hurt. I am drawing up plans for a retractable roof with lasers. Will update shortly.
Anyways here is a picture courtesy of someone I work with that got it from someone else.
Gob Bluth is the absolute perfect pick me up on this dark and gloomy day. And honestly, snow? I'm pretty sure I was acting like it was spring this week.
Welcome the best and worst of this week's edition of the Georgia Straight. The issue is focused on film but seemed lighter than usual. The cover art promised a 2006 movies spectacular. But in less you really liked Click be afraid, be very afraid. Intern, roll the clips:
5. The cover story is the Top Movies of 2006. Ron Yamauchi picked Click, "Not generally recognized as a brilliant movie upon its release, Adam Sandler’s latest is an astute reverse-engineering of Bill Murray’s Groundhog Day, in which the star’s stolidly oblivious persona is played for tragedy. Profound, with fart jokes." And Casino Royale, " In a year of disappointing hype (Snakes on a Plane, Superman Returns), one popcorn thriller finally delivered a full measure of spectacular, nerve-racking fun. Daniel Craig’s Bond is a charming sociopath, perpetually one martini from delivering (or receiving) a frenzied beat-down." Wow.
4. The first City Single of the Week of the year. Always fun to start off with the kind of gal who likes sour creme on her steak. Scarlett's ideal partner is a mixture of "Doctor McDreamy and Hugh Jackman." You do the math on that statement, but being Hugh Jackman's beard is fantastic by us. Not judging.
3. Gothe delivers the smug with a first part of his best of wine box. How else can you explain this: "WATERSTONE CARNEROS PINOT NOIR 2003 ($34.70) The price is positively bargainish, especially for the first of three Pinot Noirs on the list—huge and deep and robust, the kind of California Pinot that reminds us what all the fuss was, is, and will continue to be about." I love the idea of 35$ of wine being refered to as a bargain. Well Played Gothe.
2. Oh no. Jim Green doesn't yet think he's ready to sign up for a comeback to face Sam Sullivan in 2008 for the Mayor's chair. "I’m like really good, fresh Italian food—very simple, very clear, and very flavoured," said Green. How sad is it that in Vancouver politics that our choices are between Sullivan and a non-commital Green.
1. Ah, the review of the new film Perfume by Janet Smith offering up all the scent puns you can handle: "Still, Perfume is worth sniffing out if you’re craving something other than the usual post-holiday fare. Despite its flaws, its haunting, oddball charms, like its potions, work an undeniable spell —if you can handle a few off-putting odours." Sniff.
For about two years - and three or four trips to Oliver for some wine tasting goodness - I've passed the Black Hills Winery. Not that they have ever had a single drop of wine. That was almost enough for me to never bother, but i split a case of thier Alibi 2005 with Dan from WineGlow.
But before you get your hopes up, its already sold out. So i'm just smugly taunting you now. There are probably some restaurants you might be able to pick it up at for a price. Nice for us.
This is a pretty swish wine - and for the price ($23.90) this isn't something you should be breaking out at the end of the night. It's good, so drink it first, by yourself preferably - then break out the boxed stuff for your friends. Okay, I don't do that, much. But I've thought it. The tasting notes talk about grapefruit and limes and that's pretty true - something that comes from the subtle citrus from the 83% Sauvignon Blanc grapey goodness. I'd call it overated, but it's not, it's just so damned smooth and drinkable that it would be crazy for me to do so. Bonus points for the screw top as always.
I wasn't always the biggest Kevin Smith fan. Clerks was nearly unwatchable. Mallrats was dreadful. But then Mr. Smith seemed to catch his groove. Well, until Jersey Girl. And then a while back I watched his DVD "An Evening with Kevin Smith". Clearly he is better live than behind the camera. That said, this past week I watched Clerks II and his follow up DVD "An Evening with Kevin Smith: Evening Harder" (here's a three minute clip for ya) But seriously, watch these discs and you'll be hooked on Smith - Affleck haters or not. And here is some more things that i dug up after the impromptu Smith-A-Thon...
"While the faux title of this track is giggle-inducing enough, it's a bait-and-switch: David Cross likes to mislabel all of his tracks. Instead of diarrhea moustaches, we're treated to a spellbinding and hysterical anecdote about a night when Cross got so plastered, he could barely communicate. With "Shut Up", Cross has released the best comedy album of the last five years, bar none. If your idea of funny is Dane Cook, this may not be your brand of whimsy; but if you like nasty, frank, and bitchy laughs, get nailed to this Cross."
"'The Son Also Rises', at the close of which Addison is dancing with Maddie Hayes at his father’s wedding to Anita Baker’s 'Sweet Love'. Check out that scene, if you ever get a chance: the man is a goddamned pimp. And since David Addison is, essentially, just Bruce Willis with a different name, Willis is, by extension, a goddamned pimp too." Holy crap, it's true watch the clip. Amazing. Truly Amazing. And as a special bonus:Bruce Willis as Bruno with Respect Yourself. OMG!
24 Hours gives the cover to 250 Vancouver women who think a great career choice will be getting on the Canadian version of Deal or No Deal and brushing with the greatness that is Howie Mandel. Meanwhile Darren Parkman's Seeing Stars column gives us the a-list run down on the doings of Corey Feldman (bonus points for the mention of Corey Haim and how they are filming their reality show here for some reason), Loverboy's Mike Reno, and Anne Heche, who enjoyed a night out.
In the Sun, they too devote cover page real estate to the Deal or No Deal model search. In sports Elliot Pap gets clever with a "Grand theft, Canucks" headline before wetting him self in a Luongo tongue kiss: "On a night in which they appeared ready to lose, the surging Vancouver Canucks found another way to win.
The Canucks eclipsed the Dallas Stars 2-1 in a six-round shootout Wednesday as goalie Roberto Luongo earned nearly all his $6.75 million with 44 saves, including five in the shootout."
The Province gives Vancouver an 'F' for not knowing how to throw a party. The editorial on no fun Vancouver this New Years Eve: "When the cameras panned along Robson Street, all viewers saw was a huddled, rather glum-looking crowd at a loss for something to do. Is that really the image we wish to project to the world in advance of the Games?" But worse, is the notion of this, "Surrey put Vancouver to shame, as did Whistler. Both communities put on hugely successful celebrations with alcohol-free entertainment for all ages."
I went to see Casino Royale this weekend with some guy I met when I was a ceramic technician at the Keg. He touched my bum and it's been good times ever since.
I like Chris Cornell and he did the theme song for this new Bond film. Here it is. I think it's the best yet, or at least of this generation's Bond flicks. And because I can't get Daniel Craig out of my mind, this has been playing all day long on my compootor. BTW the movie totally rocked despite not having nudity.
I *vowed* extra hard this year that after a thoroughly debauched New Year's Eve that I would be well behaved - no more excess, particularly when it came to rich food and liquor. Irony of ironies was that my actual New Year's Eve was relatively tame, but I've since run amok in the few days since when I was supposed to be abstaining.
Yumminess abounds in the plush decor of Bacchus at the Wedgewood Hotel - it's a little old school luxury accompanied by good wine and a damn fine dessert menu.
Hello salsa? Risotto is calling and it wants the title of my new favourite menu item at Bin 941.
And just for a little variety, pints of Strongbow and one of the best people-watching patios in the city can be found at The Fountainhead on Davie.
I find the filmed in Vancouver/Richmond and upcoming CBC movie Dragon Boys (Sunday/Monday at 8:00) interesting. Probably not this interesting: "Dragon Boys features one of the most star-studded casts ever assembled for a Canadian mini-series: Byron Mann, Steph Song, Tzi Ma, Lawrence Chou and Eric Tsang star in this extraordinary human drama." Not really sure if that counts as "star studded", beyond the deee-lightful Steph Song part. Here is your gratiuitous FHM video of Steph Song which can't be all bad right? The movie basically goes something like this:
"A compelling drama and a high-octane thriller. This two-part miniseries centers on a Chinese Canadian RCMP detective and an immigrant family who confront a deadly threat from Asian organized crime"
Ya, I'm not convinced after the trailer either to be honest. Some of it looks too much like bad - read: budget -TV. Fine, some of it looks slicker bu tthis isn't a Brett Ratner film. On the one hand the trailer is almost amazingly overly dramatic (honestly that voice over? Tres hot.) while the posters I've seen around town make it look like the movie is more kind of like "The Fast and the Furious: Richmond, Like, Totally Rules." But you know what? At least it isn't another biopic of a Tommy Douglas/Pierre Trudeau/Conrad Black right? I guess we'll see.
I finally went into the new Puma store (834 Granville Street). Holy hipster alert Batman! A few weeks ago Ad Rants described the latest Puma video in a way that if you walk past the store you'll understand:
"We're having a hard time deciding whether this is actually something deserving of the label 'cool' or if it's just another brand having a hipster orgasm." In fact you can now watch Puma and Adidas on Granville street try to one up each other in hipster orgasms. I challenge any of you to find actual real world wearable items at these stores.
*I wasn't going to go there, posting Jessica Alba bikini shots but who am I kidding. Why not kick 2007 off with a shameless ploy at traffic and viewers by posting links to Jessica Alba in a bikini. I didn't make any resolutions for exactly this kind of thing. Anyway, i ended up doing it since Lainey just owned this issue with this quip:
"Crazy body. Not an ounce to spare, toned all over but the best part is – can you believe she says she wishes she was “thin…without curves”?
Go ahead. If you see her...slap her.
Amazing the transformative power of the Alba Demon, non? Channeling her rage through more creative outlets, managing to find a brand new way of pissing people off - only a first class Hall of Fame Bitch can pull off that kind of metamorphosis so artfully."
*Am I the only one in the city who completely loves the fact that Globe and Mail food critic Alexandra Gill has just reviewed, er, savaged Rare for the third time since it opened. That is not to say anything about the restuarant itself, but I not-so-secretly just like the idea of this smug shit disturbing food fight. Well played Gill.
Urban Diner wonders, "Will we see a fourth bad review? I bet Rare GM/co-owner Tim Keller would wager his Toronto Maple Leaf loving ass on it. They’ve never been so busy, thanks to ever-benevolent Globe and Mail." Honestly can you imagine dining with this hot bitch. We're pro Gill now since she is clearly trying to out-Bruni, Frank Bruni. Pretty sure Urban Diner's Andrew Morrison will not be pleased with this development.
*Umbrella blogging? Seriously? Metroblogging Vancouver's Jeffrey Simpson has a sore wrist from his umbrella and needs help. "Other people though have it down. I've seen people smoking, drinking coffee and carrying a baby all while carrying umbrellas. Me I'm switching hands ever three blocks. So what's the secret? How does one carry an umbrella the Vancouver way? " Please hold the "sure its an unbrella problem buddy" jokes. Never mind.
*2006 year of You Tube. 2007 end of You Tube? FishbowlNY writes, "taking the temperature of YouTube's "most-watched" page, Google's $1.65 billion toy faces a bigger problem than copyright issues: Sex and, moreover, clip-spam" Zing!
*Quote of the day: "The 405 and other French vehicles at least require some kind of encouragement before achieving flamehood in their native land; Iranian-built examples are self-igniters. And these guys want a nuclear plant?" [Tim Blair]
I was at the one post-Christmas, pre-New Years, gathering I allowed on my calendar and some charming film people reminded me of what an amazing yet glorious douchebag X-Men 3 director Brett Ratner is. The guy is so ridiculous he defies any real world description. And this explains pretty much everything you need to know, "There's no difference between a tacky Jew from Miami and a rap star. They both want the Cadillac and the Rolex with the diamonds." Can you even parody someone like this? Um...why yes, yes you can. Witness the Brett Ratner Video Diary:
So much goodness. And Part 2 of the Ratner Video Diary for your viewing pleasure. Please , please, please, Hollywood can you please bring him back to Vancouver for some more directing shenanigans and onset absurdity. Can you even wait until August 10th when Rush Hour 3 premieres? [see more Ratner-jinks at Defamer who have followed his antics for some time]
Kind of but not really Related: Clearly Lindsay Lohan is still smarting from her brush with 'the Ratner' back in April. Certainly there isn't much other reason to explain her New Years '07 look. "WHY, WHY and WHY?! Lindsay Lohan is trying to destroy us all. What is going on in her head, besides a rollercoast coke party? I mean….leave your outfits in the 80s!!! I think she really broke into my mom’s house, went into the garage, rifled through the bags of old clothes and popped out this little number."
*I'm not judging. But I can't be sure if this is cool, or just wrong. Although you have to respect somebody for gifting Rocket Robin Hood DVDs and posting the thank you note, non? "Dear Toren, Hi. Happy Holidays!!! I just want to thank you so much for the episodes of Rocket Robin Hood I got from you this year. I really love the show. I know it has a horrible reputation, but if you remove those redundant 'biographie', and the later episodes when they became weird, the earlier stuff is great." [Toren Atkinson's Absolute Blog]
*Best lack of blogging excuse I've read: "We were also captured by spambots and forced to take these weird blue pills, which were good at first but then slowly descended us into the 5th circle of our own personal hells. I don't remember what happened, but I seem to remember a lot of DJ Tiesto music and dancing. Tons of dancing." [Orland Kurtenblog]
*Crawford Kilian writes on the hanging of the butcher of Baghdad. "The execution of Saddam Hussein has paved yet another kilometre on the road to hell." In related news, North Vancouver seems to have also paved a few kilometers on Hell Road... We Kid! But yes, I'm sure that Kilian will be happy to know that he is right, we will no doubt see the Che-ization of Saddam. It's only a matter of time. [The View From Seymour]
*This tickles me. Hearing that the New Years Eve bash at the Yaletown Mini was a complete fiasco: "When we arrived at 1030, they were not going to even let us in the door, but rather make us wait outside in the cold till they got their act together inside. Once inside they were still doing sound checks and getting the place together. The topper was when the fire dancer set herself on fire and then had to flee out the front door with her equipment on fire." [Craigslist "NYE AT MINI YALETOWN-PATHETIC!!!"]
*Former America's Top Model girl Elyse Sewell writes a pretty amazing line "'Truck stop culture' does not exist in other countries, but every American will cringe with familiarity at the sight of this gruesome aesthetic bankruptcy:" Well, a former reality tv show star would know about gruesome bankruptcy wouldn't she. Wait, no, Tyra Banks is the bankrupt one, Elese is amazing.
*Speaking of reality TV and whoring, Reality Blurred gives us the Top Reality Whores of 2006. Surprisingly You Tubers score high: "But let’s face it: A large percentage of people who upload video of themselves to YouTube are indistinguishable from the worst reality stars, those who want to be famous no matter what. These viral video stars lip-sync in their underwear, injure themselves in an attempt to be funny, or show off their alleged acting skills, and they are more often than not conscious of the fact that there may soon be an audience of millions (or tens) looking at them."
*Serious time part deux. Wonkette discusses the foiled plans for winning the war in Iraq last year. "The plan then called for the President to give every Iraqi Shiite a pony and to give the Sunnis pots of magic gold. Kurds would receive the gift of flight, unless they decided — in a fair, democratic vote — that they’d prefer invisibility."
* The New York Times calls out Studio 60: "Oh, but that’s right. NBC already has a show at that time. It’s “Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip,” the network’s “Ishtar” about show business, with the jokes that don’t quite land, and the master-of-the-obvious ideology."
*Inside the CBC has the proof that "the You Tube era has jumped the shark." A video "of a guy listening to CBC Radio in his car. He posted it himself. I wish I could describe it with more excitement but, really, that’s all it is. Somebody unplug the cables. Clearly, the net video revolution has gone too far." That was quick.
*Ocean's 13 trailer. Hmmmm...But I do like the trailer write up at AOL: "Danny Ocean (George Clooney) and company are back for more criminal shenanigans in the new 'Ocean's Thirteen' trailer"
Hey, welcome to the 2007. Someone called this the begining of the "late 2000's". Good grief, Charlie Brown. What did you do with 2006, jerks? Starting off with some Pixies paired with a classic clip from You Tube seemed like a good idea since I refused to do any best of, top tens, or other end of year crap. But the You Tube, oh, how completely 2006 of me. Meh.
I posted this since I just watched Loud Quiet Loud - a documentary about the Pixies reunion tour in 2004 which was pretty decent. What a great band...of total freaks. (Loud Quiet loud trailer) And I just popped down an Egg Nog Truffle from Chocolate Arts. Clearly the best $1.49 truffle in the known universe. Ridiculous. Smug. Jaw droppingly good. I'm just saying. There you go, the least interesting 1st post of the year. You see I like to lower expectations friends. Back 2moro. Prolly.
