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It's Friday June the 29 around 2:52PM and

Simply Irresistible

I got nothing, again. But this is enough to counter the miserable long weekend weather I see. Blah.

It's Monday June the 25 around 9:53PM and

Catching Up

Quite frankly I was a little shocked that I could find members of a marketing group unfamiliar with the 'Dramatic chipmunk'. This was so last week. Whatever. But if they didn't know, perhaps it needs to be further shared. Seriously what was once billed as the best 5 second video EVER now has remixes - say the Kill Bill Remix or the 'curses' remix - and even the 'undramatic Chipmunk which College Humor describes as, "This is like watching a video of Santa Cluas being born..." And since my "meat is neat" t-shirt was such a hit today, you're right the Dramatic Chipmunk shirt might be on order now too.

And what else can I share while I try to get back to posting...

1. If I said a Youtube clip was here with the key words tractor fight is that something you might be interested in?

2. I was waiting for a good parody of Microsoft Surface. bwhahahahahaaha.

3. This could probably make my friend Anthony vomit. a creepy seafood buffet video.

4. Damn it if I need to watch Arrested Development again after this description "He’s like Jesus, Moses, Abe Lincoln and Bo Jackson combined" - it's a tribute to GOB. Bonus: Chicken Dance Collection.

5. Am I the last one to discover the ridiculously tatooed Megan Fox? I'm just saying that she may be good thing.

6. Walshes girlfriend on the new season of Entourage is Michelle Lombardo. In case you were still thinking about it.

7. New Noah Bambauch film - Margo at the Wedding.

8. Pictures from Wes Anderson's Darjeerling Limited. Hurry please Mr. Anderson.

9. Thank the maker!

10. Watched old episodes of Northern Exposure this weekend. Janine Turner rocked the mom jeans something fierce.

It's Tuesday June the 19 around 8:31PM and

Notes From Toronto Part Deux

24 hours until I return to the west coast. This is the 2nd of no doubt regular ventures to Toronto this year and you bet your ass I'll share my stupid thoughts.

1. Great breakfast was had at Rustic Cosmo Cafe. There seems to be some debate about it at various places, but the cowboy breakfast was good. The pancake was the highlight. Certainly the constant hotel breakfast for 10 days had something to do with my joy here.

2. Really have no idea why on a Saturday night the Midi Bistro was near empty. The food was great, the music sufficiently jazzy, and the place ad-or-able. One member of our party thought the Faux-Filet Grille was tofu. What a burn, 'cause it was tasty striploin with heeps of garlic butter and pesto. Serve with delicious Cotes du Rhone and Bob can certainly be your uncle.

3. Saw Toronto Blue Jays lose to Washington nationals. Enjoyed Frank Thomas hitting his 496 career homerun. Enjoyed that one player had Coolio's Gangstas Paradise as his intro music. Seriously, Coolio. That is amazing. Wish I was sitting in the action seats where two of the cutest girls ever serve you stuff in black cocktail dresses.

4. Learned that last Saturday might have been Goth Pirate Day on Queen Street West, with the amount of frilly shirts and stuff. No eye patches, but close enough. Freakshow. ARRRGGGHHH.

5. Much Music Video Awards are fairly lame.

6. Lake Ontario jokes. Although I can't think of any.

7. Not enough Starbucks. Seriously, there are so few per square mile that they tend to have lines out there door. This is madness. I'm a block from work here and there is only one.

8. The Royal Ontario Museum has a shiny new entrance. Other than that, most everything else is closed inside, well unless you need to see a bunch of greek sculptures of bearded men. Which is cool. Not $20 cool. On the plus side the girls working there were delightful. Who knew blue blazers were so cool. PS: Oh, and Daniel Libeskind, your $12,500 chairs, while funky and comforatable, are built for Dr. Evil and are completely smug. More at Torontoist.

9. At some point, missing Vancouver clearly, I watched an amazing episode of Beverly Hills 90210 called "Things to do on a rainy day." It featured the completely stomach churning 90's boy band Color Me Badd. Don't believe me? Watch this video. Wow.

10. Tie: That Wayne Gretsky should not be in the restuarant business just as surely as I should not play hockey. And the feelings I have about Gretsky's rival the feelings about this store in a small mall here that was pimping an amazing service. It's called Woven Moments, and if you can imagine the thrill of products "proudly woven in the Blue Ridge Mountaints of North Carolina" and photos of your dogs being made into tapestry wall hangings, then you can imagine the greatest tri-fold brochure in the known universe! Business in the front. And clearly Party in the back. Enjoy.

It's Tuesday June the 19 around 6:41PM and

Buzz Dump: Action Packed, Notle Approved Edition

*I really think the networks need to make this show. Notle, Busey, Kristofferson in NBK 24/7 a reality show. Come on, it's unbelievable, certainly better than most other shows. So good. Even better the guys who made it call their company Wicked Awesome Films.

*More extras from Knocked Up, "Jay and Seth vs. The Apocalypse".

*Trailers: Start with Coen Brothers No Country for Old Men. Then watch 3:10 to Yuma for some western yum yums. Then for kicks I'd say hit the There Will Be Blood trailer. And then just soak up how insanely smug this Pixar trailer for Wall-E is.

*Roger Clemens in 2057 is pretty funny stuff. If you like baseball.

*God totally missed the boat on this one. Panda dogs. Pretty amazing non?

*This is the most amazing 'ad' for Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles toys.

*Top 10 Unintentionally funny TV intros. This sums up the fun when you click, "It's Genius. This is my number one all time dream job if time and space were not an issue, a writer for Charles In Charge."

*10 Best Moments from 30 Rock.

*Geek out on this. The Star Wars galaxy. Pretty much everything awesome happened in the same area. Hoth. Endor. Dagobah. "Yub nub."

*Listening to: Graham shot me some hot grooves. St. Vincent was playing this morning. I think a trip to the Lamplighter July 30th would be a good call.

*Hillary Clinton picked her new campaign song. She starts you off with a pretty funny spoof of the Soprano's finale. Then makes you go to her site. But really this is what people picked? Can you even win a presidential race with a Celine Dion song? We're doomed!

It's Tuesday June the 19 around 6:26PM and

Random Finds: Weird Science & Tina Turner

At some point this week, the topic of "Weird Science" came up. Something about the magic of 1980s computers and bras on heads to create women. Whatever. The point is, the movie rules. And as always, Youtube answers the call. God bless you John Hughes. Put your hand up in the air if you find it ridiculous that this movie was made 22 years ago...

And you don't really need to know how I came to be watching this amazing clip of "We don't need another hero" by Tina Turner.

It's Tuesday June the 19 around 6:14PM and

Evangeline Lilly Salutes YVR

Somehow I managed to miss Evangeline Lilly in the Vancouver Airport. She was angry about it too, clearly. Next time Kate.

The Superficial: "Although for some reason it's way less annoying than when Britney Spears or Avril Lavigne do it. Probably because she's so adorable. It's like a puppy trying to bite you with its tiny little mouth. You just want to shake you head side to side and go, "Who's a little princess? You are! You are!"

It's Friday June the 15 around 9:58AM and

Two Dead Birds, One Stone, blah blah blah...

My wife knows Family guy so I can't watch it with the kids. She suspects our 4 year old understands Quagmire's ulterior motives but I don't. I could be watching Family Business on Showcase but I don't. Anyways at least I am spending time with the kids so don't judge me.

Luckily she hasn't clued into Robot Chicken yet, I tell her it's on Treehouse.

It's Friday June the 15 around 9:17AM and

Hey OB, maybe a pawn shop isn't the best place for this message...

I like Barack Obama because he had a great finishing move in Mortal Kombat. I also like him because he is the least likely to piss on the industry I work in.

This clip is a smooth move but isn't it a little shady to tape this in a pawn shop?

It's Friday June the 15 around 8:52AM and

In Favor of the Olympics falling...in my personal poll

I am about 49% in favor of the Olympics and 47% against. The missing 7% or whatever is going to wait until the day of the opening ceremony to make up it's mind. I mean I was dreading having kids until the first creature was dropped in my arms at 6am 4 years ago. Now I want thousands of babies. And just like my relationship with the Canucks, and most Vancouverites, when the going gets awesome I am climbing on-board. But until then I don't really care.

What is keeping me from that 50% mark right now is that there is a crackdown on business's that contain Olympics in their name or as of recently, location. Whoever manages that department or thought it up, needs to be drowned like a witch because you are evil. Is this because the citizens and tourists might think that place is the official pizza sponsor of the Games and you get no cut? Or are you more scared people will show up thinking that is a venue? I heard the first brothel opening downtown is using the historic ring logo only they claim they are holes...like a menu...that's going to infuriate the Fuhrer...

It's Monday June the 11 around 8:37PM and

Local Documentary Takes on The Business of Getting High

Any documentary produced locally in Vancouver that starts it's trailer with Ronald Reagan gets my vote. I was going to start my post off about The Union: The Business Behind Getting High by calling the filmakers a bunch of filthy hippies - especially director Bretty Harvey, but then it just won Outstanding Documentary Feature at the 2007 Winnipeg International Film Festival. So there goes that.

Maybe the irony that while I post this - finally - I'm watching the Beverly Hills 90210 Season 2 episode where the track team is high on steroids (seriously, the track team?). That so kind of meta. I mean Dylan actally talks about Steve's gonads. Aloha! I feel like Mr. Hand in Fast Times, "What are you, people? On dope?"

I haven't seen the final cut, yet, but this looks like a big fat juicy documentary without either Al Gore or Micheal Moore. That alone is worth checking it out. I'm sure when Harvey finds this posts and me calling him a filthy hippy, he'll have some more information for us.

It's Monday June the 11 around 8:26PM and

Another Video Competition

Darren Barefoot is still working it, even though he's left town. He wrote this morning about a video contest from Canada Place searching for what makes Canada great. "Whether it’s a game of road hockey or shoveling the driveway, we’re looking for fun and imaginative video clips that highlight the Canadian experience."

This ends June 19. if you can't beat the lame sample video, than I can't help you. And if you didn't want to bother, how amazing is this call out: "It’s time to put on your thinking toque and get filming. The more outrageous the better! Just remember to keep it safe and clean." Thinking toque? Bwhahahahahaahahah!

It's Monday June the 11 around 7:43PM and

Late Monday Random Items

*I may be in Toronto right now, and it may be hotter than I like, but a week of 28-30 and sunshine confirms my instincts not to buy a jacket this past weekend after I left Vancouver and that ugly weather. And the above commercial with the wicked Feist was playing on every channel I watched on my flight.

*This is the best weather promo, ever. I beg of you, Global, to let Wayne Cox or Kristi Gordon to do this kind of stuff. Please. Please. Please.

*To my vegan friends...in your face.

*Speaking of meats, Interpol's new website has some rad photos of animals consuming each other. Glorious carnivore wallpapers.

*Line of the day from Gawker, "Isn't Africa kind of last fall? We don't have the attention spans for that stuff. You know what we do care about, though? Celebrities!"

*Line of the day take 2, also from Gawker, "Let's just say that if you like watching douchebags cavort you won't be disappointed."

*Timeout magazine throws down. "Why the hipster must die."

*Oh, NBC, finally the reality show we've been waiting for! Age of Love. I'm not sure if this really happened. Could June 18th come fast enough?

*The Sopranos and design. Bada bing.

*The new single from Matt Pond PA "if you want blood" is pretty rad - and for real, you're gonna be glad you had more tambourines in it Matt.

It's Wednesday June the 6 around 11:05PM and

The Chair is against the wall

AMC was playing Red Dawn all night long today. That is just totally awesome. Let me count you five reasons this is amazing (almost as good as Family Guy's Red Dawn: The Musical):

1. Two words: The Swayze
2. A young Powers Booth.
3. 1984 Cold War was er"fun"?
4. Bonus Jennifer Grey pre-Dirty Dancing
5. Considerably less creepy Charlie Sheen.

It's Wednesday June the 6 around 10:29PM and

Gastropod and the magic of $15 bacon taste

Since Urban Diner called me out for my shameless and pathetic excuses for not blogging - I completely agree with the coined term 'slothtrodden' Morrison! (It's on, sir! Let's hit the town soon you cheeky bastard!) Really, I do - I answer with a trip to Gastropod and a timely review with the $15 dollar 'bacon' taste still in my belly.

But seriously. Gastropod (1938 West 4th Avenue). I didn't know what to think - I mean the constant buzz of the West 4th foodie explosion is enough to just write off crossing any bridges, but then again, why not - they serve Le Vieux Pin wine which is secret code for yummy, I've heard (more on this later, trust me). The brightness of the space - and what my friend Kasia called the clinical "The Handmaid's Tale" uniforms of the waitstuff were a bit much. But the food. Good lord. I think my tastebuds are drunk.

The Salmon Tar Tar was excellent, and anytime - and I mean ANYTIME - you have something that is as ridiculously tasty as the smoked veal sweetbreads - like I said the best $15 piece of bacon. Evah - you have to just abide. The Duck Sous Vide was pretty unreal, but the Lamb loin sausage was particularly insane. Ya, sure, I'll go back to having hot dogs after that? Serve with Malbec and discussion of current politics of Poland and William L. Shirer's classic and voila!

PS: The lemon tarte, however unnecessary, was absolutely ridiculous. Honestly, "lemon tyme ice milk" and fresh basil. You're out of control. Eating this basically made question my place in the universe. Okay, that overstates the facts a bit. But you get the idea.

It's Tuesday June the 5 around 10:35PM and

Foul Ball: Blog Will Eat Itself

Hardy har har, spammers. Our posting schedule was thrown out of wack when some spam robots decided to eat The Vancouverite back end. Thanks for that. Jerks. Hence my leading off with the Rolling Rock Foul Ball commercial. Anyway, I've taken comments down for now, whatever. But posting will continue thanks to the amazing Mr. Carter who figured out the old customer service angle at the hosting co.

Rejoice! Grumpy opinion continues...starting now. I mean tomorrow. Maybe.