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It's Tuesday December the 29 around 11:20AM and

The Star Wars A-Team Show

I'm not sure I need to watch the original trilogy ever again. It's been playing non-stop on Spike for like 3 years, and it seems dated to me now. But I would certainly watch a sci-fi/space based action series that was like this mash up of Star Wars and The A-Team. Hey, ABC, maybe as a replacement next season for when Lost is over. (via Topless Robot)

It's Tuesday December the 29 around 11:09AM and

"Say It Ain't So" - Weezer (1995)

Heard this on the radio the other day. I had no idea that the lyrics were saying this, “This way is a waterslide away from me that takes you further every day…so be cool.” I'm not much of a lyric understander sometimes I guess. (Via SoupSoup)

It's Tuesday December the 29 around 10:34AM and

Why do some TV channels exist?

I question the existence of TV channels like TVTropolis. And yet here I am watching a Survivor: All Stars marathon on the channel. But they are playing constant promos for a show called Rescue Ink. Say what?

Let me get this straight. It's a show about a bunch of tough-guy tattooed dudes going around saving cute kittens and puppies? How does something like this even get made? I suppose that answers my first question, it's because there are channels like TVTropolis.

Rescue Ink? There are way too many TV channels. Related, I was watching Much More, which was Much More Music at one time, but since it rarely, plays actual music, it's just Much More now. So they can play, Sex Rehab with Dr. Drew, Gene Simmons, I want to work for Diddy, and whatever else they want, just very few music videos. Although I can't imagine 24-7 music videos anymore either - that ship has sailed hasn't it?

But now there is more than just Much Music, there's Much More, Much Vibe, Much Loud, Much More Retro, and Punch Much. Or, as I like to call it, overkill.

It's Tuesday December the 22 around 6:07AM and

Frosty The Inappropriate Snowman with Neil Patrick Harris

It's Monday December the 14 around 8:53PM and

Christmas Wishes From Sir Sean Connery

Enough said. Happy Holidays.

It's Monday December the 14 around 8:31PM and

A Very Star Trek Hanukkah

We are at the half day mark of Hanukkah. Happy days my Jewish friends. I want two things right this second.

1. This Menorah.
2. A lot of latkes. Preferably any like these. Yum.

It's Monday December the 14 around 8:05PM and

TV AD review: Alvin and the Chipmunks 2

On the one hand is a movie like Fantastic Mr. Fox. Smart, Clever, fun, interesting. On the other hand is the Alvin and the Chipmunks Squeakquel. I just saw the TV spots twice during How I Met Your Mother (Bad, Bad, Bad brand association CBS). But the worst part about the spot is just how utterly dumb it is, so dumb that I nearly contemplated uploading it to the tubes myself, since, of course it's not on Youtube - it's that dumb. As in, it's even dumber than most cat videos on Youtube. I know, shocking. It's like the internet jump itself riding a shark or whatever.

This is making me wonder how completely stupid the next generation must be - they're going to make the Gen Y's look like a bunch of hard working mensa members people instead of the greedy, selfish, and incompetent little babies they are. Here's why:

1. Boy chipmunks singing "You spin me round (like a record)", while spinning...OMG, they're in the juicer. Do these idiot lumps even know what a record is?
2. Girl chipmunks doing Beyonce's Single Ladies.
3. Jason Lee already in cast and on crutches, crashing on random skateboard, yells "Alvin." Jason Lee, what is your problem?
4. One of the rats, sorry, chipmunks plays high school football, and scores touchdown by riding the football.
5. Said rat says catchy, age inappropriate, "shake what your mother gave you."
6. The end.

I can actually feel these kids getting dumber.

It's Tuesday December the 8 around 8:03AM and

Fact: Polar Bears Actually Love Warm Weather

Look at how happy that polar bear is on the beach. He's so cute. And why wouldn't he be happy, he's with a girl in a bikini. Duh. Canary Island Tourism for the win! (Via Copyranter)

It's Tuesday December the 8 around 7:56AM and

Tarantino in Japanese Ad Form, at last

Absolutely have no clue what they are talking about, or what the ad is about, but the combination of Quentin Tarantino, a talking dog and some sort of dog shaped speaker phone is like finding a Billy Ripken error card in a pack of 1989 Fleer Baseball Cards. Rare indeed. Can we get a cable channel that plays nothing but Japanese ads? Thank you very much.

It's Tuesday December the 8 around 7:46AM and

Michael Bay Explodes Christmas

I was wondering why there were no explosions in the Christmas 2009 Victoria's Secret Ad since it was directed by Micheal Bay. Thankfully there is a 90 second version with explosions, helicopters, and knife throwing. Happy Holidays from the director of Transformers 2.

It's Friday December the 4 around 7:22AM and

Rex Murphy on the stench of ClimateGate

Not sure how Rex Murphy squeaked this commentary past the comrades at the mothership, but he is on fire. In short his review of the shady academic work, "You wouldn't accept that at a grade 9 science fair."

It's Thursday December the 3 around 7:27AM and

Vancouver Green Capita Logol: $239,000 of Awesome

Remember when Chairman, er, Mayor Gregor Robertson launched the new branding for the city? You know, that we were the Green Capital now? Well according to 24 Hours, that green logo and slogan cost us $239,000 plus GST. Here are some genius musings from the gold-laden brand book:

"Green is connected to blue, land to sky and water, the city to its people and ideas to capital. The graphic V is also reminiscent of the ribbons of an Olympic medal, a nod to the Games that started Vancouver's search for a new business story."

So let me get this straight, we have to shut down the petting zoo because of budget issues, but we could find nearly $250,000 to get a logo and some ridiculous branding book about a new business story?

This makes me want to order more copies of Green Hell, and send one to Mayor Gregor for Christmas thanking him for all his tireless work making us greener and stuff.

Previously on The Vancouverite:

Welcome to "V" your Green Capital, October 1, 2009

It's Wednesday December the 2 around 7:44AM and

From the Dept. Of Stupid Ideas: Dubai Marvel Theme Park

Looking back to 2007, you'd think the idea of creating a Marvel Comics Theme park in Dubai would seem both "why there" and "why"? At the time Dubai was the hot spot of the world. But there here are designs for crazy Marvel Dubailand. And yet, Dubai was so flush with cash, any stupid idea went. Snow and skiing inside in the middle of a dessert. A man made island shaped like palm tree. Man made island shaped like worldMarvel Comic Theme park. Air conditioned bus stops. And of course the fun is always building in Dubailand. Spiked has a punch and definitive post about how stupid all of this was:

"Let’s be frank: a lot of the proposed real estate schemes were, frankly, shit. Do you want to live in a bungalow surrounded by animatronic dinosaurs? Then City of Arabia is for you. Fancy a flat in the world’s largest, largely Dubai-themed theme park? Try Dubailand (not to be confused with Dubai World). A gated community in the shape of a falcon, festooned with replicas of the seven wonders of the ancient world and a larger than life-sized copy of the Eiffel Tower? Step forward, Dubai Falcon City."

It's Wednesday December the 2 around 7:34AM and

Christmas Flashback: Santa in 1951 was Awesome

Ahhhh, Christmas 1951. Let me just through another Yule Log on the fire and pour myself a hot toddy. Oh, and get my pack of Pall Mall cigarettes. Sweet:

1. Cure for "throat-scratch" was, duh, Pall Mall Cigarettes
2. Santa smoked back then. Yeah he did.
3. "Outstanding....and they are Mild!"
4. The perfect holiday gift. Pall Malls say "Merry Christmas" for you. And possibly "Hello Cancer" but it's the thought that counts. If Santa is smoking and all.
5. The puff chart. It's science-y. Neat!

(Via Design Interviews)

It's Wednesday December the 2 around 7:28AM and

Scarecrow and Mrs King on DVD

You have to wait until March 2010, but our long national nightmare is over as Scarecrow and Mrs. King season one will FINALLY be on DVD. 1983 called to tell you how ridiculous and awesome it was then. Kate Jackson, hello! Phew.

It's Wednesday December the 2 around 7:19AM and

Meanwhile....in a cafe in Paris

Even in the polite street cafe society of Paris, there is still time to debate more than just overthrowing the government, Carla Bruni, and burning cars. Like, for instance, who is better: Kirk or Spock. This just made my day. Le Fin. (Via Fuckyeahfrancais)

It's Tuesday December the 1 around 3:09PM and

Tiger Woods Story: Now in 3D Animation Form

I like that this Chinese news clip does two things amazingly well:

1. Break down the entire Tiger Woods controversy in a way I can actually understand.
2. Make use of AMAZINGLY rad 3D reenactments to really show me what is going on.

This will save big media. It's genius. Get on this CTV. Like now, possibly with a 3D Tony Parsons avatar. I'm just brainstorming here, but I trust him. I beg you to leave Chris Galius out of this future solution Global. (Via Agency Spy)