« The Vancouver Magazine Website: Worst than being an Extra? | Main | Hobo Wines at the Creepiest Wine Tasting in the Universe »

It's Monday October the 23 around 7:46AM and

Georgia Straight Watch: Get Your Nuke On

Okay. It’s been a couple of weeks since I’ve been able to devote any quality time to The Georgia Straight. But the lure of the City Single of the Week was just too much and here we go again with ‘The 5’ – a look at the best n’ maybe no-so-best of Vancouver's entertainment weekly.

5. Let’s start with The Gothe. Dudes, he’s making pronouncements about the next big thing in wine, the south of France, so listen the hell up. Quite frankly what had me at hello this week was the idea of the perfect phrase in the universe, “meat wine.” You know what to do…

4. In honor of his new album “The Information”, Beck gets served this tasty bit of dish: “There aren’t any blunders on Beck’s latest, but there sure are a lot of bleeps à la R2-D2. And last I checked, the mid-’90s Atari sound is still too recent to count as retro. Consequently, this album feels, at times, pretty dated for someone touted as one of the great revolutionary musicians of our time.”

3. The cover article is about local actor turned war movie playa, Barry Pepper. This part from Pepper is hilarious: “It seemed like at that time in the industry there wasn’t much thinking out of the box. If you were going to hold a casting session, you got out your casting manual, and if you were going to direct, it was going to be linear directing. If you were a Canadian bad boy, then you had a coonskin cap and cigarettes rolled up in your T-shirt and you had tattoos of an anchor. Since then, that has changed, but at the time that was kind of what motivated me to move to L.A.” Of course that article about Pepper is accompanied by another about how some local actors have to fight stereotypes to achieve Pepper-like success, actors like the darling Lanette New and her fancy website.

2. This week’s City Single of the Week calls himself J.T. And I bet he's been going around the city telling girls that he will bring “Sexy Back” too. Then again anyone who has photos of themselves lying around like that, and describes his job as “Keeper of the FUNK/DJ” is beyond simple mockery. Here’s the thing, when someone asks you who your ideal partner would be, how can you answer Krista Allen and Sara Silverman. Why in the hell would you cross the sexy and hilarious Silverman with a D- list actress? It makes no sense PS: people who use words like “unhypeness” can shampoo my crotch.

1. Yes! Finally. Best headline: “B.C. mulls new atomic age.” I wish this was about Gordon Campbell obsession with nukes, Kim Jung Il style. Sadly it is not.