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It's Thursday August the 10 around 11:42AM and

Georgia Straight Watch: Marketing War, Drinking Spritzers

Ah, Thursdays. When we can go out grab a free newspaper and enjoy all that the majestry of alternate journalism and all it has to offer. Here's your weekly top five best/worst things about The Georgia Straight. Let's do this:

5. Single of the Week, John. Le sigh. He likes his eggs, "In an omelette with freshly squeezed OJ, fresh sourdough from one of our great local bakeries and of course, prepared by me." John, my poor misguided John, of course by you will be cooking them, you're single remember, and no wonder judging by the looks of it, you're the real estate agent of Creepy Town.

4. Unintentionally funny headline: "Simon says he’ll get more balls this fall."

3. Oh, no you didn't Jurgen Gothe. Did you just drop the spritzer bomb? Why yes, yes he did.

2. Number of Posts in Georgia Straight News Blog from August 2-10th? 1. Apparently the Straight has already lost intrest in blogging the news.

1. The Cover story, taking a brief sojurn from simple photography of late, promises an exciting news story on "Spinning the Wars" - "Politicians rely on clever techniques to win your support for military adventures in the Middle East and Afghanistan." I'm not sure anyone told Charlie Smith this or not, but this whole marketing of the wars thing doesn't seem to be working right now. That would have been interesting to mention. Oh, and while the topic is hot, no mention of the whole fautography from Lebanon, which is the ultimate in modern war propaganda? Green Helmet {Warning: Graphic Photos.]? Anyone? Anyone?