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It's Thursday January the 12 around 8:53PM and

Vancouver Mag January Issue Breakdown

Since they were so quick to update their interweb page, I gave Vancouver Magazine another chance. Good thing the editor, Matthew Mallon, was bounced out this week. But i came to a new conclusion about this publication. The problem with it has nothing to do with the web at all, it's actually a bigger issue. Like maybe, pretending to be a big cosmopolitan magazine when you're not. Don't believe me? Let us count the pretentious ways with the first issue of the year:

1. I think it is pretty interesting that actor/director Charles Martin Smith has lived and worked here since the 1980's. And yeah, it's cool he's been working on Da Vinci's City Hall. But in the Q&A did we need 4 questions about 1997's Air Bud? Maybe we wanted to hear about, oh, say his role in Curtis Hanson new film Lucky You. Crap, it's about poker, never mind.

2. Page 26. About 200 words on the awesome $500,000 4-bedrooms in Ladner. It's only 25-minutes away. I smell a bargoon.

3. I was going to say the Vancouver Life section was a totally lame Malcom Parry (Vancouver Sun) ripoff. Whoops. It is Macolm Parry. Our bad.

4. Without a doubt the worst column in all of Vancouver media. "Loveletters" by Alexandra Gill and Kevin Chong is, in the words of Basil Fawlty, a waste of space. Making even the ultra trashy topic of threesomes come across as much fun as a root canal.

5. The Best of the City 2006 feature. When you subhead something like this with a, "What you'll be doing, watching, eating, & who you'll be covorting with" there are big shoes to fill. There is almost nothing interesting in this section and the "avoid" factoids about "Paramount Pastiche" and "celebrity journalsim" are ridiculously smug. You know if you put some actual celebrities on the cover, more people might read this magazine. Just a thought.

6. An entire article (and one of the two available online) about "Casual Fine Dining". Example: "At Saltlik, a gorgeous new room (its soaring wooden walls, huge windows and modern light fixtures say goodbye to traditional steakhouse décor) on Alberni Street." Cut to the chase, this is an earl's that serves steak. Get over yourself.

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Comments

Posted by: No

January 17, 2006 03:08 AM

why is it a good job Mallon bounced out? Maybe things didn’t work out because he wanted to take it in a different direction but couldn’t because of publishing constraints. But I suppose you wouldn't get that as this blog is obviuosly published from your bedroom.

Posted by: No

January 17, 2006 03:08 AM

Posted by: Jackson Murphy

January 17, 2006 08:36 AM

Publishing constraints....yeah, that's the ticket. And he would have gotten away with it too if it wasn't for you kids and that damned dog... wait is this you Mr. Mallon? Hello? Whatever.

Didn't work out? He was fired, get over it, it happens in the publishing world. I just hope it was because somebody figured out that the magazine was a directionless, totally unfun, mess. I would have done a larger overhall, but I digress.

And get it right, we often post from our bed while we sip hot butter rums, not just our bedroom, okay. Deal with it.

Posted by: No

January 25, 2006 08:09 AM

Oh Mr Murphy, unfortunately yes publishing constraints does sound like a bit of a cop out. However, online blogging/magazines/fanzine what ever medium you care to call The Vancouverite are simply not subject to the same editorial controls as a magazine published by transglobal publishers with global budgets and global not enough people buying magazines. Sorry if this seems simplistic but one feels one must spell this out. Of course people get fired that stuff happens in publishing, but get perspective, is it really necessary to insult someone who has just lost their job and the efforts they made. The over haul obviously wasn't enough. If only we all ran our own personal blog, sorry I mean daily hyper caffeinated snarky news and opinions - posting whilst sucking hot bitter rims sounds like fun.