New Moon. New Moon. New Moon damn it. Curse people magazine and their Sexiest Man of the Year issue where RPattz was robbed, or something. Roger Ebert savaged it in his review this week, "“\Sitting through this experience is like driving a pickup in low gear though a sullen sea of Brylcreem." I'm sure this won't stop the Twihards from melting down all weekend. Don't forget your cheap RPattz approved meatballs at Glowbal nerds.
Speaking of things to look at, check out the Scout Boutique Fashion Show tomorrow will feature Mad Men inspired pin-up designs by Stop Staring and holiday wear by local designer Sweet Soul. (152 East 8th Avenue - right off of Main Street). We're sending our fashionista to cover this, so stay tuned.
SATURDAY
Savage Love author Dan Savage is playing the Chan Centre for the Performing Arts (8pm, Tix $25). The narcissist in you can submit questions in advance for additional humiliation when asking those "where do babies come from" stupid questions. it's like an evening with Kevin Smith but not as fun and kind of insulting. What fun.
Something tells me that a bottle of Russian Stoly Vodka (certainly not that lame Swedish Absolute) and a couple hours at the Vancouver Russian Community Centre Christmas Bazaar (11-5pm, Tix $1) stuffing your face would be satisfying. Once you are wasted follow that up with a trip to a real life Etsy show at Cambrian Hall (215 East 17th, 11-5PM, $2) or save yourself the trouble and just get online and look at the wares of Regretsy home of the "Handmade: It looks like you made it with your feet" art.
SUNDAY
Is ZZ Top really playing the Abbotsford Entertainment and Sports Centre? Yes, yes they are. (Doors 6:30, Show 7:30, Tix, $85/75) Or if the memories of Back to the Future III aren't enough, there is always the East Side Culture Crawl. If you have an aversion to seeing artists in their natural environment, don't look them in their eyes.
Blogging is a tough racket. Complete disclosure: yes, clearly that has been a lackluster amount of posting the past six weeks. I could make up a lot of excuses, in fact earlier today I briefly flirted with the notion of claiming that I was on strike with the rest of the writers. Then I thought about running re-runs of old content, but I'm pretty sure it would lead to some sort of argument with the SEO people I know. And worse, seeing Stephen Colbert banner ads today claiming he invented the concept of the "Me-Run". Damn you Colbert! Damn you!
I thought about saying something about my soul/heart being replaced with a peanut butter sandwich, but who wants to hear that from a god damned blogger. That would hurt me more than you I'm pretty sure. I don't suppose "real work" would be acceptable to you either? And if that didn't work, i doubt "my dog ate my blogs" would work. Although I did almost try to pull the SAD card.
So, excuses are over, for today at least. There may not be new episodes of The Office, but here, at The Vancouverite, the blogging returns. Writer's strike be damned!*. I'm pretty sure the 12 of you sending me angry emails every week about how lazy I am will be happy for this breaking news story. I can't promise that the content will be better than the above video, but you knew that already...
*Unless this prevents me from joining the WGA at some point in the future, then this is all part of your imagination after you had the blue pill. That is all.
Good lord, has it really been this long between posts. What a deadbeat. My apologies, I've been busy working on some other projects (code for complete slackdom). At least Luke posted for the first time in a while, that's cool. Hey, it's not like I've turned into Nick Nolte or anything like that. And certainly I haven't missed much have I? I mean, The Singing Bee had 13 million viewers last week, which either means everyone is in the same boat, or it's summer and nothing is happening right now.
It is summer isn't it? Nope, just checked, sorry. Amuse yourselves, posting will begin again today most likely. Until then ponder this:
I hear, that on the heels of The Transformers success (still haven't seen) they will be making a Thundercats Movie. Why? I don't even undertand this. They are sword using human cats. Creepy and ridiculous. That is all.
Hardy har har, spammers. Our posting schedule was thrown out of wack when some spam robots decided to eat The Vancouverite back end. Thanks for that. Jerks. Hence my leading off with the Rolling Rock Foul Ball commercial. Anyway, I've taken comments down for now, whatever. But posting will continue thanks to the amazing Mr. Carter who figured out the old customer service angle at the hosting co.
Rejoice! Grumpy opinion continues...starting now. I mean tomorrow. Maybe.
I was in Toronto for nearly a week, which explains the distinct lack of posts around here. Whatcha gonna do? So here are some thoughts from my trip (I was working mostly) while I attempt to catch up with all things Vancouver and Lindsay Lohan.
1. Looks like Vancouver doesn't have the monopoly on ridiculous condo developments. I came across "Festival Tower" which promises buyers a world first, "one part condo, one part film festival." Don't mind the creepy girl wrapped in film stock. I don't know why this would be desireable at all - but the promise of "the world's most unique condo! Where film and a fabulous lifestyle meet" is completely hilarious. I guess not as bad as a creepy Madonna pushed building like this. Okay, she beats this Pomaria video.
2. Confirmed. Tim Horton's coffee really is just black tap water and tastes only of sugar and cream if you order a "double double". There is no way an actual coffee bean was harmed in the making of thier coffee. How does this company stay in business serving this crap? Wake up Ontario!
3. I heard from reliable sources that there are only 4 restaurants in the city. Okay maybe this is not true...
4. I'm a total jerk. So, it would be perfect to be at Irie food joint. Pretty ridiculous jerk chicken wings and mashed potatoes with corn and jerk gravy.
5. Three words: Hot. Sweaty. City.
6. There is a waitress at the Queen's Head pub that reminds me of Lilly Allen (looked like her, dressed like her, and talked like her). I gave this shaddy little pub a D- for food but an A for her, especially when she said, "the chef is terrible." And he was! So cute and bitchy. Love it. And then I kind of moved on to Kate Nash - another Lilly Allen clone. Watch her Foundations video - the line "you said I must eat so many lemons, cause i am so bitter" is charming.
7. Toronto's Little Italy has the most impressive collection of cement gardens front yards I've ever seen. That is so feaking rad. Take that Al Gore, pave everything! PS and unrelated: Polar Bears are kind of evil.
8. After having a really great dinner at Czehoski - a place I saw on Opening Soon like two years ago- i felt smug. It's kind of like eating in a butcher shop turned into a loud club. But the food was good (Lamb confit - are you nuts?). Discoveries: Sapporo beer cans are made of 12-inch steel, clearly. Lilly Pilly Sauvignon Blanc is pretty drinkable. This is a 2-cholcolate mousse kind of a place. Table next door quote, "Get my lawyer on the phone" sounded pretty outrageous for 11 pm fellas. Morris (Carlo Rota) from 24 was standing outside with two really good looking girls but no Chloe. Final answer: Four and a 1/2 smuggies out of five.
9. There was a girl, all dolled up in her lululemon uniform, on the plane who had her yappy little dog. The dog whined like a baby. Gross. Um, you were on West Jet, honey, you're not Paris Hilton.
10. Street cars are completely gross. Not as gross as the Labatt Blue at the Horsheshoe mind you.
This weeks pack of songs comes on Friday. Personally I think this is the best set yet featuring new tracks from Feist, Modest Mouse and Blonde Redhead, not to mention the stunning "Revival" by Soulsavers.
Thought I'd do things differently this week and post on a Thursday. Mainly because I didn't want three consecutive playlists back to back (it's depressing that I'm the only one putting stuff up here) and secondly because I didn't get around to it.
This weeks sixpack has some fun stuff in it, so enjoy!
Where the hell have I been? Great question dear readers. Apparently my less than frequent posting the past 2-weeks has been somewhat of a problem for some of you. Well, it would seem that not everyone can listen to books on tape or in this case blog all day during their regular superhero jobs. You know who you are. All this while half the staff of this site is either traveling around the globe smugly eating chocolate and beer, or having babies. Gosh.
Anyway, regular posting should start again very soon. I know, I know, you've heard that before and you've said, "your the worst blogger, ever." Possibly, but there we are. In this era where we all are broken up by the news of Anna Nicole Smith's death, and the cosmic rays that those Danes are blamming global warming on. Anyway, I'm back, sort of, and promise not to go breakin' your heart, much.
You know the drill, another week, another six pack. This weeks brings a new track from Aqualung, who is opening for Pete Yorn on Thursday night, and a track from the upcoming Willy Mason album
One month in, and our fourth installment of The Vancouverite Sixpack. This week we have a great old/new song from the upcoming Arcade Fire album, as well as some new stuff from Andrew Bird and The Klaxons.
So here we are, still going strong into week three, and I've got six more tracks coming at you, including the infectious "I Am John" by Loney, Dear, and the epic "The Birth And Death Of The Day" from the upcoming Explosions In The Sky album.
Me thinks the ability to comment on our posts is defunct. Well actually you can comment, but it isn't coming through. So until it's fixed you can send tips, news, ideas, smut & nudie pics to the following address: vancouverite@thevancouverite.com
Well, I have to say I'm pretty proud of myself, and have actaully made two consecutive weekly posts. (Even Jackson didn't think it would happen). But true to my word I'm bringing you another six pack with more music for you to jam to this week. And, although I know that absolutely no one posts any comments, We'd love your input and suggestions for new music we might not know of yet.
So I am going to try something new for 2007. Instead of a monthly playlist, I'm going to post six tracks to help you get through the week. My hope is that you can all be exposed to more music and also keeps me more in tune with what's out there. Each weeks pack will be accompanied by artwork incase you wish to burn the tracks to a disc or transfer to your MP3 player. And by all means if there is someone you think we should be listening to, leave a comment or send us an email. So without further ado here it goes, the first Vancouverite Sixpack:
Hey, welcome to the 2007. Someone called this the begining of the "late 2000's". Good grief, Charlie Brown. What did you do with 2006, jerks? Starting off with some Pixies paired with a classic clip from You Tube seemed like a good idea since I refused to do any best of, top tens, or other end of year crap. But the You Tube, oh, how completely 2006 of me. Meh.
I posted this since I just watched Loud Quiet Loud - a documentary about the Pixies reunion tour in 2004 which was pretty decent. What a great band...of total freaks. (Loud Quiet loud trailer) And I just popped down an Egg Nog Truffle from Chocolate Arts. Clearly the best $1.49 truffle in the known universe. Ridiculous. Smug. Jaw droppingly good. I'm just saying. There you go, the least interesting 1st post of the year. You see I like to lower expectations friends. Back 2moro. Prolly.
I have lived here my entire life and I can't answer the question: What should I do in Vancouver? Which means I don't know where I live well enough or I am not the load of fun I led myself to believe. In fact the most fun I have had in my life was outside this city, and country.
-The Aquarium is good times but it is actually as you would expect. There isn't anything outstanding there but that doesn't mean it's not worth the trip. The giant squid is something you need to see to believe.
-We have a spectacular array of restaurants that are diverse in fare, quality and price. Some our outstanding and unmatched, some are a nightmare unless you like Cockroaches and equally disturbing service. Check out UrbanDiner.ca for hot places to eat. I like Dairy Queen myself.
-The Vancouver Art Gallery is another destination that hasn't been shut down. Upcoming events like Fred Herzog in Spring will be worth getting in the door seeing as that it showcases Vancouver then and now.
I honestly don't know what you shouldn't miss. There really is lot's to do but I am not the person to pass that info along. Check out our blogroll for Vancouver blogs. I am sure you will find loads here:
Another month has passed, and therefore it's time for another installment of The Vancouverite's Playlist. I've managed to put together a solid set of some of my favorite tracks from the past month. So grab a coffee or bourbon, settle in and enjoy!
1) Sleeping Lessons - The Shins
2) We Are Squirrels And This Is Nuts - The Love Machine
3) Stay Put! - The Blood Arm
4) Hang Me Up To Dry - Cold War Kids
5) Thicker Skin - Can Joann
6) Camera - De Rosa
7) So Divided - And You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Dead
8) Carry Around - Annuals
9) Been Here Before - Jeremy Enigk
10) You've Already Gone - Jenny Hoyston and William Whitmore
11) High Flyer - Scanners
12) Conscious Life - Aereogramme
Listen up my little pretties. A year ago, The Vancouverite was born. A year ago I was all, thanking my design team for making a damn fine blog, and all that kind of crap. And I would be again too if weren't for those kids and that dang dog. Anyway, we were young then, and we'd be celebrating the wonders of The Vancouverite redesign on our first birthday, but when you pay your staff with peanuts, no literally nuts, it is really hard to get things done on time, unless you are a squirrel I guess. Thanks, Graham! So that glorious baby Jesus-like rebirth will have to wait until later in November, prolly. I'm sure you're all glued at the edge of your seats anyway.
But in a rare momment of sort of non-irony and anti-snark I wanted to take the time to thank all the people who I've dragged into helping make this site what it is. I want to thank Graham and Carter for making The Vancouverite (redesign or not) look so effing good. There, I said it, stop screwing around now. Honestly. You're both lucky I can't even spell the word "code". Bastards.
And while I was traveling around the world during the summer the worker bees Luke and Josee somehow managed to keep the site more than just alive, even although Luke probably pissed off 1/2 the city and Josee got obsessed with those damned Spirit Bears. Now there is also Katherine our Canucks Blogger, who keeps me from actually having to follow hockey, which is perfect since I only like it when the Canucks lose. Anyway, Thank you. Serioously. But could you all post more and fill in those TPS reports, that'd be great.
Oh, and thanks to the readers who for some reason keep coming back day after day and in bigger numbers. It's like the freaking Sand people. How is that even possible I ask?
PS: I hate Halloween. More on this later. Also I've pretty much lost that bet I was telling you about. When I see the aforementioned Jack Layton costume this morning I'm going to be singing the glory of the Democrats. See what this website has done to me?
Summer is over, nothing to look forward to except grey skies and rain for the next eight months. To celebrate the demise of another summer, I've put together a list of 12 of my favorite songs from the last month of Summer, including an amazing remake of "Many Rivers To Cross" by The Walkmen, and a great song by local Vancouverite's Whitfield called "She Takes Me".
1) Movies Of Antartica - Stars Of Track And Field
2) Nausea - Beck
3) Stuck Between Stations - The Hold Steady
4) Bling (Confessions Of A King) - The Killers
5) Cato - Of Montreal
6) Many Rivers To Cross - The Walkmen
7) I'll Do Whatever You Want - Memphis
8) She Takes Me - Whitfield
9) Something's Going To Come - Adem
10) False Start - Sparta
11) All Fires - Swan Lake
12) Electrical Storm - Josheph Arthur
We have a new addition to already stellar Fall Initiatives. Strongly Worded Letters will feature real letters written to Vancouver Companies or Conglomerates with Stores in Vancouver. Apparently Jackson got the idea after writing a pretty hateful letter to Parliament asking where the hell all the French people are in France.
We figured that we are not alone in getting the shaft so hopefully you can use these letters and take select paragraphs from them that help you fight your cause. Maybe forming some kind of Supreme Ultra Worded Letter that will cause the reader's head to explode...wouldn't that be something. You can also comment on an issue that's grinding your gears and we will help you form a letter that is sure to get you some freebies or sued for threats of violence.
So to start off I have a letter to Home Depot. Whom was once my savior is now my cancer. Enjoy!
With the TV season set to kick off next week, and you little worker bees about ready to enjoy a long weekend, I thought I would take a minute to tell you about what The Vancouverite has cooking for the fall blogging season.
The Vancouver Idiot:
As you can already see, our Contributing Editor Luke now has his own column, "The Vancouverite Idiot". What you will see is regular ramblings from our very own resident bafoon savant and prank monkey. This should be loads of fun, and the only question I ask, should I hire the lawyer now or wait unitl the lawsuits pile in?
More Podcasts:
Even though we have the most terrible audio podcasts in the world, that won't stop of from doing more of them. Our first season of podcasts (now at four) will end in September with 10 or so episodes. Then in time for our one year anniversary on Halloween, we'll start season two but this time hopefully, we'll have our loveable Vancouver Idiot along for the bumpy toilet sounding ride.
More Interviews:
Our latest feature, "The Vancouverite Interview" will happen weekly - our first was with sneakerographer Al Cabino - and we have plenty of them in the works. Next week's is off the hook, as the kids are saying. Stay tuned!
The Vancouverite's Official Canucks Blogger:
Starting in a few weeks another new feature, we'll have a new writer joining the fold to talk about the smut, the glory, the smelly stench of the sweaty pads, every agonizing groin pull and all the filth that is our Vancouver Canucks. Stay tuned for more details on our regular commentator about the Canucks you won't find anywhere else. Just wait until blogging "sweeps week" when we blog about these bums all week completely drunk or something smutty like that! Some might call it "stunt blogging". We say, bring it on. Nonis, your going to go to sleep cursing our names!
The Vancouverite Version 2.0:
And finally in late October-ish, we're going to fire up a new fresh coat of paint on The Vancouverite website. Not really sure what that means, but it sounds technical and stuff. I guess those crazy Panamian designers will be working overtime now!
1) Don't Go Do It - The Rapture
2) La Monogamie - Malajube
3) Western High - Captain
4) Go With It - Pete Yorn
5) Where You Are - Camera
6) The Crane Wife 3 - The Decemberists
7) Time And A Half - Anechoic
8) Will Remind Me - Le Chevre
9) Here's Your Future - The Thermals
10) Summer Dress 2 (Iodine) - Plus/Minus
11) I-Spy - Get Cape. Wear Cape. Fly
12) Our Hell - Emily Hains & The Soft Skeleton
Can you believe it is Friday again? It is, trust me, and it's time for your afternoon clip show of the best and worst, the hot and the cold during this delicious week. We recomend you enjoy this with a fun dip, and roll the clips, Chico:
HOT
1. Mike Harcourt. That shirt he wore this week will echo for all eternity. Like we said earlier, this bitch is red hot. PS: Just checked it out, www.harcourt2009.com is totally available. So lets get this Harcourt for Premier Boogie train out of the station again and rolling.
2. Province columnist Michael Smyth. Not only did he bring us a great Lorne Mayencourt quote early in the week, he then used both "boner" and "breakfast fatty" in his Thursday opus.
3. Tacos. Contributing Editor Luke reminded us that Tacos are nature's 2nd most perfect food after the banana.
4. Tricia Helfer. Don't care that she is doing personal appearences to shill wine. Don't care one bit.
5. Old Miami Vice. If you don't know why I can't help you.
COLD
1. The PNE. Check out the podcast for more details on this week's biggest popsicle of non-hot.
3. Liberal Caucus Retreat. We just like saying Caucus! But seriously Bill Graham's press releases enjoy about the same amount of reality as Tom Cruise from his Scientology bunker.
4. Third week in a row, our Jessica Alba has been chilly enough to garner a spot on the list. Enjoy sweetie.
Welcome to another Friday afternoon clip show of the best and worst, and since it's August, and it's Friday you're all probably on patio getting drunk already. So grab some gris from the ice bucket, cut a slice of triple cream brie, and roll the clips, Chico:
HOT
1. "Snakes on a Motherfucking Plane" damn it! As if you didn't need another reason, beyond it was filmed here, here's one of the first reviews: ""Naughty by nature or perhaps more by design, these snakes don't just dart out of toilets; they also slide up bare legs and under dresses, moving in and out of more bodily orifices than the adult-film star Ron Jeremy did in his prime." Vancouverite Weekend Box office projection guess: $42 million. Put your guess in the comments. [Via Gawker]
2. Elvis. And here's to our own Luke for spending three days passing his 42.3 pound Elvis tribute meat meal! Congrats. And no, Luke they don't have BBQ here. Can you believe that? Savages.
4. Chill Winston. You heard it here first. Smarter than Cactus Club served with a Side Salad. Yum.
5. Insite. Valuable lessons friends. Kate Moss can do cocaine and become bigger than ever. Tax funded needle candy injection sites can save us money. Who knew. Imagine if we had 5 Insites! Emmmmmersssoooooooooon!
COLD
1. Gordon Campbell's mini-Cabinet Shuffle. Should have done it on Friday Gordo, when nobdoy would have cared. Michael Smyth and Vaughn Palmer were still working and mocked your silly little shuffle of dead wood.
2. Flugtag. And come to think of it, Redbull too. That's so over.
3. Flugtag Shout outs. We're looking at you 24 Hours. Your shameless cover destroys your early week crack covers. And putting this on the cover instead of half-naked angry vegans in body paint is just dumb. If your paper wasn't free I would ask if you were trying to not sell them.
4. Jessica Alba. Surprise, Surprise. She's still a bitch apparently. Maybe she can go Flugtag herself? (Last Week's #1 Cold Winner drops 4 spots.)
5. Sanafir. Thanks for concentrating all the douchebags in one spot on Granville street, jerks. Oh wait, we already have Skybar. Still colder than Mel Gibson. Ouch.
Honarable Mention Coldy: David Pratt. See you at Sanafir, bud.
Pride week is coming to a close and the parade today was a smash. I didn't go because I don't live downtown and getting there sucks and parking is ridiculous. I don't know anything about it anymore anyways because I am not gay and my gay friends have abandoned me since I got married and had kids. Apparently they only wanted me for my booty. Hope it was a blast though.
And you thought the ordeal of the Spirit Bears was over. I took sad delight in reading 24 Hours for the first time in, well, a long time. And now I know why I haven't missed it's orange and its general tabloid tackiness. And this news might just send poor Vancouverite Writer Josee, off the deep end once and for all on this subject. To which we apologize.
You see, its just that 24 Hours points out that a new bear, this time is dedicated to Corner Gas actor Brett Butt. Really? Perhaps it was the headline, "Is that Butt bare? No, wait" but 24 Hours had me at "Is". The giant Brett Butt bear is at the CTV building so you can go and kick it in the shins, or secretly desire it (it goes on auction later this year). Damn you charity! Praise be 24 Hours! Damn you Spirit Bears.
It's that time of the month again, well actually, I'm coming at you a day early with the newest edition of the Vancouverites Playlist. I thought this might be the perfect ending to one of the nicest weeks of the year. I've got this months playlist set up to play out like a summer day. Opening up with Lilly Allen's unforgettable single "Smile" and ending with the absolutely sublime "A Star Is Born" by Amusement Parks On Fire. Enjoy!
01) Smile - Lily Allen
02) Bright Idea - Orson
03) I Blame The Sun - The Horror The Horror
04) O Yeah - End Of Fashion
05) Wrong Choice The Lovely Feathers
06) You Needed More - The Sleepy Jackson
07) Walk Away - Bears
08) Isabel And Leonard - Envelopes
09) Running With Your Eyes Closed - Mojave 3
10) Bandits - Midlake
11) You And I Are A Gang Of Losers - The Dears
12) A Star Is Born - Amusement Parks On Fire
Well hello there! Just because the Cat's away doesn't mean that the hits don't keep coming. It's the first of the month and it's time for a little something we like the call... The Vancouverite's Playlist. It starts out fast and furious and gently flows into some more mellow tracks. It's been a great month in music, and it's my pleasure to present you with my favorite tracks of the last month.
01) Enemies Like This - Radio 4
02) Consolation Prizes - Phoenix
03) Dance In My Blood - Men, Women & Children
04) Late - The Spinto Band
05) Whe Should Never Have Children - Absentee
06) All In Good Time - Ron Sexsmith
07) Episodes - Pela
08) The Mountain - The Stills
09) "Intrumental's" Volume 01 - Arthur Russell
10) Stop Me - Sophie Barker
11) The Avalanche - Sufjan Stevens
12) The Silence Show - Snailhouse
Giving someone like me access to your blog is comparable to sending your children to Uncle Feely's Daycare/Pig-farm. Not necessarily Jackson's best decision but it could be his sweetest...Be warned that I think run-on sentences are cool and grammar and punctuation is time better spent talking about stuff like this cornucopia of info:
I watched the Preakness today. It wasn't very entertaining and I don't suspect I will ever have that 3 minutes of my life back but at least I got to see what all the commotion is about. I think Vince McMahon needs to put a WWE spin on horse racing as we know it. Instead of naming a horse "Sister Vagina" or "Lilly Foot" they are titled like monster trucks, titles like "The Bone Splitter" or "The Glue Huffer" or something that makes people find a corner to cry and pee their pants.
There is an all you can eat sushi restaurant in Metrotown called Su Shi Ya. I don't suggest you ever go there, ever. However if you do not heed my warning then you should be prepared to pay by credit card. That way when your meal is crap like ours was, you can just sign off the slip with 'go to hell' or make them feel guilty with 'thanks for totally ruining our anniversary, glad we came here' or leave it blank. Apparently I am not alone in this half ass review.
I took my 3 year old spaz to the Aquarium this morning. If you haven't been there in a long time, go now. It's $17 for an adult but considering you can spend 3 hours there and still not see everything, that's totally worth it. You can also get a membership for $40. There are few really cool placed in Vancouver where you are supporting more than some old man. Don't be cheap, if you have or know a young child and you are on this website then you have $20 to spare. Pry the PlayStation control from juniors cold malnourished hands and go check out the new giant squid they have in the old orca tank. They feed the dolphins smelt I think, but they throw live goats into the giant squid tank. They also have one of the creatures from this guy's movie, and it's not an early 1900's elitist.
I will be back with a new post early this week. This is the first time I have ever used the internet so please let me know if it was any good or not. My writing is pretty weak and is only cheapening the brilliance that is the Vancouverite but it's tough because I only have 6 fingers and getting at the outer corners makes word selection hard for me.
Good Morning Vancouver! Sorry for the delay in posting, and this may continue for the next few days. Why? Well, The Vancouverite is heading out on the road for some travelling, that's why. I'll be posting from all over the place, and I'll try to keep up with Vancouver too. I'm starting with a night in Singapore before heading into Saigon - more on that later.
But don't fret dear readers, I've got a great selection of guest writers who will be popping in to keep you up to date on Vancouver's happenings and beyond. When they start to post, I'll hook you up with some background information. So be nice. Give me a few days to travel, and come to terms with the heat, and we'll be back to normal, although very far away. Honestly, who goes to Vietnam in May?
Wow. I know that lately I've been more full of excuses than posts, but really how exactly do five days just vanish like that. I'm going to maintain that I was abducted by some friendly aliens from Rigel 7 or caught in a wormhole. Thankfully they let me go after I made them cry, to which Kang said, "These are not tears; we are vomiting from our eyes!".
But seriously I had one of those runs of luck. In fact it felt like I was in that ridiculous new Lindsay Lohan movie. Okay that was creepy. But come on think of this: The perfect parking places, the skipping waiting in lines, the movie starting as soon as you enter the theatre, the greatest French Toast ever, the best time losing an entire afternoon at Havanas patio. But what do you care about that, you just think I was being a deadbeat. So, let's get back to the links since this post is about as smug and worthless as it gets. And I'm okay with that.
It makes it all worth while to run The Vancouverite when you get this kind of awesome email:
I mean it when I say that I'm a big fan of The Vancouverite. It's excellent and fun. And I know that you are actually talking directly to me in it; I have successfully interpreted the many clues you have laid out, detailing your wishes. And so it is I have started the many garage fires and vandalized the special needs' elementary schools, per your directives. Thy will be done.
Vancouverite Art Director & Music Producer Graham MacInnes kicks up his world famous music selections one more MASSIVE notch today, with the 2nd edition of The Vancouverite Playlist - now in juicy podcast form and hot new interface form, the Vancouverite Playlist has so much good stuff on here it's crazy!
14 delicious tracks to get you through hump day. Featuring Flaming Lips and Jose Gonzalez. Only good can come from this. Mmmm...podcasts...Go there now and listen. Tres bien.
Well, 2005 is coming to a close, and 2006 is upon us. Our first post was way back on Halloween, and we still haven't had our official launch yet, but we have had 214 delicious posts, and some pretty damn good feedback thus far. Except those people who think we're just a bunch of blog warmongers.
I still haven't found The Vancouverite an intern yet - maybe the promises of calling Bill Good and stalking Tamara Taggart just weren't enough to overcome the sweatshop-like working conditions, although truthfully we haven't looked very hard - apply today!
Our first 8 weeks of posting has been a lot of fun - and when I'm not dropping nuclear bombs and fighting in Vancouver's blog land I've managed to post more than enough about the Canucks, Jennifer Good, 24 Hours, and Lynne McNamara. So I thank you for all your visits in 2005, and please come by early and often in 2006 when we start posting for "real". Which means you should look for the lawsuits, or name calling, to begin stacking up as we begin our assault on Vancouver's media scene.
In January we will have to drop the pretension that we are still in "beta" and the postings will be coming more regularly, hopefully. January will also mark the launch of our misguided politically obsessed political site, Fed Kicker, which has been preoccupied with things other than the elections, so far, but is keeping it's powder dry for the 23rd and the sprint for the finish in the elections.
Meanwhile here are some links to ring in the new year:
Here's a new regular feature we want to test, since we're still experimenting with content for one last week of "testing" here at The Vancouverite before we launch "for real" and really start lighting off blog nuclear weapons and such. Maybe we can just do some late night posts that have nothing to do with, well, Vancouver or anything at all. Let's see shall we:
*Craigslist posts we can seriously get behind: Ugg(ly) Boots: "Those furbies-on-feet were fashionable in London over two years ago. Run -- don't walk -- to the nearest thrift shop and ditch those minging things!" HEH.
*Okay, we'll bite. Is the Wookieepedia really needed? (via Cinematical) Direct the Star Wars totally rules, Vancouverite sucks comments below.
*Fox is really playing a prank on us for sure. There is no way this is for real: "Professional skaters will include Nancy Kerrigan, Kurt Browning, Tai Babilonia, Jenni Menno, Lloyd Eisler, and John Zimmerman, teaming up with the "celebrities" Dave Coulier, Todd Bridges, Deborah Gibson, Bruce Jenner, Kristy Swanson and Good Day LA Weathercaster Jillian Barberie" for Skating with Celebrities. Aren't they?
*A new Honda UK ad (Weiden+Kennedy) is online, and amazing if you ask us. The actor in this spot is as perfect as the whole concept. (Via AdRants)
*Thank God. The French, for years have been the model of the world for stuffing down brie, eating dozens of butter soaked croissants, then chain smoking. Well, according to Ad Freak, the french are also, finally getting fat. And they are blaming "le Big Mac."
*It's been filming here for months. X-Men 3 teaser trailer. Featuring 100% more cheese. But even Brett Ratner couldn't take away the fact that Famke Janssen still looks great.
Our post from last night about the impending Blog War over Vancouver has generated a nice little debate. (Note to staff: graphics featuring nuclear bomb blasts are a winner.) Our friends over at Metroblogging have a good post recognizing our attitude about playing nice with the other blogs, and calls for us to collectively make fun of CanWest. Done & Done.
Meanwhile, Richard Eriksson over at Urban Vancouver doesn't believe it's a war at all, taking the Jeff Jarvis line that, "blogging is not a battle nor is it a war, but rather it's a conversation." That's a fair point, but just becuase we're in the citizen's media era, doesn't mean that competition has to stop at the url. And what we don't want to do is to drift anywhere near this hopeless direction. Kris Krug, who needs to post more often, says, "but it is is war in that only one site can come up FIRST when you type 'vancouver blog' into google."
At anyrate, all of this is making the Vancouver blog scene a much more fun and lively place. And making fun of the Global Overlords will be good (what evil lies at the Can West Employee Store website for instance- Asper hats?), getting bought out by them (Hi Leonard!) or taking them over (realy? just $10.64/share today) will be even better.
Oh, and while we are talking about the every competitive Vancouver Blog world, here's something to think about. While we will be adding more writers shortly, what we really need is an intern!
If you are interested in getting us glasses of Pinot Noir, making runs to Starbucks, ironing, and doing some real research and reporting this could be your calling! Duties may also include closely following CTV's Tamara Taggart, watching Breakfast Television, and calling the Bill Good Show on a daily basis to leave messages just like Bart Simpson does to Moe. And no, we're not joking. 10-15 hours a week of work, sweatshop conditions. Send your resume and a headshot to us and we'll get in touch if you're the right Vancouverite.
Just a quick note about the fun of being live and still working on a website, for some reason or another, our comments feature wasn't working very well this week, we think it's back to normal, but if you notice it's busted, please give us an email. To Paolo over at Immutably Me who brought this to our attention, thanks again.
I took my 3 year old spaz to the 
